robertliguoriwritesstuff

John and Wally, Part 1.

Wally: “Afternoon, John. Welcome to the team.”
John: “Good afternoon. Sorry, who are you again?”
Wally: “Wally, senior code monkey.”
John: “Hmm. That’s an interesting job title.”
Wally: “Yeah, it’s cyclical. Some times they ramp up our titles to draw in newbies who look for words instead of dollar signs on job offers, and some times they ramp ’em back down when the developers get restless and need to be reminded of their place. You can see when I got my last promotion, then.”
John: “Huh. So, what do you do here?”
Wally: “Really, I’m kind of a reprise of Dilbert’s Wally. Similarly cynical, but with a slightly different set of priorities.”
John: “No, I meant your role on the team, not your narrative…OK, we’re doing this? We’re going full meta?”
Wally: “In the intro, at least.”
John: “If this turns into another 1/0, I’m out.”
Wally: “Hey, don’t be knocking 1/0. That shit is art, man.”
John: “Uh.”
Wally: “Yeah, I swear. Ain’t gotten an HR complaint, either.”
John: “How does that work?”
Wally: “Kid, stick with me, and I’ll explain all of the dark secrets of modern corporate IT to ya. But first, I’ve got a data problem. Go bring this over to Mrs. Thrush, would you?”

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